Without You Mom
By Kelly Elizabeth Miller
Without you, what could I do? I've caused
you sorrow and pain, hurt and shame.
You are me; without you there would be no me.
I can say I'm sorry but that is not enough..
You want proof you say, and everytime
you give me another chance I blow it.
You think that I don't love you
and that I do not care.
But if there was no you,
my troubles I could not bare.
Every day I worry about you passing away
and how strange my life would be without you
and I go crazy.
I know this poem won't change a damn thing,
but I just had to let you know
each and every day my love for you grows.
Sometimes we fight and scream and yell
and tell each other to go to hell.
My one wish is to go through one day
without any hurt or pain.
The only thing is to say I am sorry,
but that doesn't help.
I love you Mom.
Kelly - November 17, 1982
Kelly was going on 15 when she wrote this, one year before she was diagnosed with JHD.
You Are Always There
By Kelly Elizabeth Miller - Age 15
When I got into trouble, you were always there.
And when I got into fights, you were always there.
And when I had a fall to drugs, you were always there.
You know all of my faults, but you still stay.
I've hurt you so many times, but you're still always there.
I've put you through so much sorrow and pain
and over a million times I have disgraced your name.
But still again, you were always there.
Why? I don't know. But each day you teach me more,
as you've done in the past. And if anyone ever asks me
to describe the words "love", I would say truly and honestly
say "My Mother"
Kelly didn't let me read this until years later, when I was typing up and putting together all our poems into a book. Kelly loved to have visitors read her poetry out loud to her.